The Anatomy Of Seduction - Chapter One
By Mr. X | August 26, 2007
I make the approach to the velvet-roped entrance of the Skybar at the Mondrian. It’s a brutish scorcher of a night. The lustful allure of the evening hangs in the air dense like sea mist off the San Franciscan coastline. Here, the femme fatales mingle and dance with blithe spirits, the faintest aroma of Malibu on the tongue.
I stand in the recess of the entrance and pause to survey the atmosphere. The night’s just warming up: the music busy, the lighting a perfect blur of stylish and dim. I smile broadly and confidently. The chap at the door has done a superb job at policing an equitable measure of blokes to birds. Tonight will be brilliant. I am a seducer. I’m not looking for the girl. The girl is looking for me.
I request a Laphroaig, the proper scotch of choice, glad-hand the bartender. He makes an aside about my timepiece. It’s gaudy, overbearing. Tacky in every sense of the word, but critical to the game of seduction for reasons I’ll later explain at a later point.
A handbag settles on the countertop to my 3:00. It’s owner, a perfectly quaint mark to start the night – Girl A. Girl A is reserved. She sets a brief, however intoxicating, gaze in my direction before gliding into the chair. I give it a beat before telling her I like her hair. And then I proceed to ask if that’s her natural color – a hint of skepticism in my voice. She smiles, but can’t help but show a bit of sourness at my backhanded compliment. I’ve planted a bomb in her mind. A minute later she can’t help but follow up with my query and, more importantly, my criticism. She asks how I can be so cavalier and why I’d suggest her hair being an artificial color. I’m in. Within five minutes she’s laughing, the physical space between us shrinking by installments. I lean back – she leans in. Our roles have reversed. Now that I’ve opened her up I start to exhibit reservation all the while making firm eye contact, exhibiting worth (seduction is a very linear process).
Mid conversation she invites me to study the tattoo hiding discreetly on her hip. Her stomach is incredibly firm, a golden brown of a testament to the ludicrous hours spent poolside. She’s looking for a compliment. Her pupils have dilated. Kinesics and the breakthrough studies of eye movement confirm: this change in pupil response holds a significant meaning. Her eyes are a window into her subconscious. But I make no mention to the firmness of her stomach; the perfect shade of tan. A seducer is an exception to the rule at all times.
The night grows as the room continues to swell. We maneuver our way through the loud crush. She pulls me by hand out onto the dance floor. I give it a gentle squeeze. She presses back (an involuntary indicator of interest I’ll touch on later). Brilliant.
An hour later we hop a taxi. We find our way to some random loft of some random friend with randomly perfect music playing – a soundtrack to the movie-esque night. People load into the flat seemingly by the truckload. Drinking, laughing and carrying about until they slowly fade out on the sofas, in guest rooms.
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In a special arrangement with SOHO Magazine I’ve agreed to tear open a portal into the underground world of seduction. The mechanics I’ll dissect are well-proven, empowering any man of any breeding and posture to close the deals they want most.
So, first thing’s first, and the first thing you need to develop is an approach. Having rolled out my own red carpet, let’s explore the 10 laws paramount to any approach.
LAWS TO THE APPROACH
The approach is widely held as the toughest element of the seduction. Most chums quake at the mere thought of engaging a woman – let alone a group of them. Although some guys have a naturally ability to glitter charisma and star power, most don’t… they come across like twats.
So in an effort to properly equip the chaps of the Valley I’ve penned a few of the more salient points to pocket during The Approach.
1. Be the alpha male! An alpha male (a) knows the dynamism of a firm stare, (b) has a savvy wit and humor, (c) keeps proper hygiene, (d) and smiles with a fearless confidence. I want to shine a special light on that last point – the smile bit. I can’t place enough stock in the importance of walking into an establishment with a smile. People’s eyes wander constantly in the parlor and lounge atmosphere. They’ll take notice to your confidence and demeanor, believe me. Studies have proven:
it let’s people know that you’re a somebody who knows what he wants.
2. Don’t be timid. Confidence is your shield in battle. Remember, at all times, you’re playing The Game. Nothing is real. I’ve approached over 1,500 women in the last year and a half alone and every time, without fail, I pick up something new. Think of this as a faux reality; it means nothing. You’re going to stumble before you dash. Tonight: at the very most take three (3) seconds before making your move. If you size up a chick for too long you’ll come across like a stalker (and that’s bad).
3. Keep your emotions at bay. Emotions try and jostle you, throw you off center; they tell you when you should be embarrassed, remind you to be self-conscious. Again, nothing is real. You’re going to misstep; plan on it, actually. Eventually you’ll be better attuned to the more ethereal cues in social dynamics.
4. No Blind Approaches. No one likes to be surprised, especially in an environment that forever encourages groping, the tugging of an arm, et cetera, to gain attention. Of a similar vein, never approach a target from straight on. This is overwhelming to a mark; aggressive and direct. Also, you lead her to feel that SHE’S the reason you’re walking in the direction you are. You want to go for casual. The best approach is flying in at an angle, her 2 or 11 o’clock. This says I had other things going on, but I might have time to chat for a second.
5. Keep two or three well-developed openers in your arsenal. Keep it simple and stick to what you know. This is the groundwork to creating intrigue, the most important component to all of the approach. In the early stages of your development, as you’re making the contacts and refining a more activating opener, go with something simple: “Wow, so this is the party table” to “Shit! Did you see that fight outside?” Something unassuming like “I’ve got to ask, how’d you flag a server around here? I can’t find one for the life of me. ” Your mission is to get in, but as soon as you’re in jump tracks. Openers never make for good conversation pieces.
6. Never everº! I’ve heard a variety of blokes opening conversations with “I’m sorry”, “Excuse me” or some other ugly cousin to. Are you comfortable begging for her attention? Do you like to wear your insecurities like an oversized gold chain around your skinny twit neck?? Should you have to earn her conversation??? No, no and NO! So grab your nads, remind yourself that life is too short, and brave forward with confidence you flimsy dick fool!!
7. Friends first. Your mark doesn’t exist. You need to isolate her, keep her chained outside, ignore and estrange her. The friends. Nine times out of ten they’ll ruin the deal if you fail to see the importance of this one. She may even like you. (And by the way, if you think you’re going to approach a show-stopper sitting all hapless and lonesome you’ve got another thing coming.) Winning the friends over, planting the seeds of intrigue, and steering the conversation will have her toppling over the table for your attention. People want what they can’t have. Also know that she puts a lot of stock in her girlfriends’ opinions. Make them a champion for you post-haste.
8. Play the numbers. I touched on this one a bit in the previous point; seduce the group. Gents oft cower to shriveled little wienies at the prospect of approaching a table of three of more – this point underscored when the male of the species is present. Take it from me, 90% of the time they’re either (a) friends, (b) family, or (c) coworkers. If guys are present at the table I try and find commonality right out the gates. The ugly friend? She becomes the warm little center of the fat little space we share together. Play the numbers and be the exception to the status quo.
9. Nix the compliment. Ok, so after depriving your mark of conversation now it’s time to gear up. What do you do? (Unfortunately, that’s detailed in the next issue) But I’ll tell you what NOT to do. Never compliment her. Not so soon. If you’re missing the trend here, you need to set your status above hers. If your goal is to close the night in the warm sheets of a foreign bed you need to offer her something in return, something to hook her (e.g. intrigue, excitement). Complimenting her at first opportunity pronounces desperation. She immediately becomes the dominant personality in the social interaction you’ve created. Never compliment her.
10. Never buy a mark a drink: In opposition of popular NBC programming and day time soaps, this clichéd accession never works and is one of the wobbliest of constructs to a seduction. You shouldn’t have to buy her attention. It’s that simple. This goes back to creating status.