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The Perfect Storm
By Anonymous | August 6, 2007
One weekend last spring, all the elements came together to form, as I’ve come to coin, the Perfect Storm of hooking up. The weather patterns indicated a potential storm of chicks was brewing: there was a weekend-long concert that all of my friends were going to attend and get very drunk at. I was still sleeping with my ex-girlfriend at the time and I had recently acquired a new hook-up friend, so I figured I would get some ass from at least two girls that weekend. If I’m able to secure a random hookup, I thought, this might turn out to be the greatest weekend of my life to date.
On Friday evening, my ex called me over for a pre-concert booty call. We liked to fuck before going out because she felt comfortable talking to anyone when she was in post-coital euphoria, and I felt comfortable getting belligerently blackout drunk and not having to worry about getting my dick up the rest of the night.
On Friday night, I met up with my new hookup friend after both of us had gotten thoroughly sloshed at the concert. I went back to her place and, too drunk to do anything else, got naked and made out for a bit. The next morning, I woke her up by fingering her, and after she came, she gave me a blowjob. This had become our custom. She didn’t like having random sex, but she loved the cock, and I didn’t want to be in a relationship with a 19-year-old, so it worked.
I also got a call from a friend who was coming in from out of town for a marathon. I had met her the previous summer when we were in the same study abroad program in China and was always trying to hook up with her but she resisted. On Saturday, I went from my hookup friend’s house to her hotel room after the marathon. She was exhausted, so we took a nap together. When we woke up she mounted me and we had sex. She may have just been bribing me to drive her to the airport that evening, but whatever she was doing, it worked. It was awesome because I ignored my ex’s phone call later that afternoon and didn’t even feel bad about it.
That night, I went to the concert and met a new girl whose friend was dating my former roommate. I talked to her for about 30 seconds and then we started making out. We went back to my place, and luckily, my hookup friend was not there. I was exhausted, but we hooked up nonetheless, and she stayed over.
I had weathered the perfect storm: the on-and-off ex, the friend with benefits, the girl from out of town, and (as it turned out) the new girlfriend. On Sunday morning I woke up and thought, “If I die right now, it would be okay because I’m pretty sure my life has just peaked.”
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